Let me tell you a story for a starter.
We all know how chaos it was during 2020-2021. It was chaos inside my house too. But I couldn't see any flaw in how my mom took care of us. Looking back at how my dad, my maid, me and my sister, all got Covid-19 at different times, I can't imagine how roller coaster the experience was for my mom. The fear and all the things that she needed to do / provide. She did all perfectly well, WHILE she was working from office.
Yes, she is a working mom (and I'm so proud of her and I don't know how she did it).
It was this evening when the memories stroke. I began to wonder.. Has mom ever gotten sick? I don't think she has. I (sadly) hardly see my dad takes care of my mom. Even during Lebaran when my maids are all going home, it's only the "girls" who do all the house chores- and mom did not say a thing to argue about that. Well I'm not blaming anyone, different family might have different approach. But actually it's heartbreaking to grew up like that, asking myself everyday, 'is this going to be my future too?'
Well.. yes, I'm talking about us, Women, our characteristic of nurturing people and the "old thinking" that we should be the one to take care of the family. The topic I want to bring up in this post is about gender equality and what I think about it.
For me, gender equality is about seeking the right to take care of ourselves.
Things like pursuing our dreams; working in the company that we're dying to get into, becoming a politician or a CEO, pursuing our passion, live freely to do what makes us happy, go on adventures, and so many more.
We're so tired when people said 'buat apa sekolah tinggi2 nanti juga jadi ibu rumah tangga' - I'd be so mad if anyone throw that line to my face.
The equality we're seeking is for the right to be happy when we get into our dream job, the right to be happy when we got promoted at work, the right to be happy to be just like you guys, to pursue our highest potential when we want it. And get support on that, instead of 'you need to come back and take care of our house, if not you then who else'.
My last sentence in previous paragraph, links to the story I've told you in the beginning. I think some of the guys still think, 'oh I support you in your career but house chores is still your job' and I want to tell you guys, we're not in that era anymore. Relationship is a commitment between two, and it takes two to tango. Don't you guys think so?
It's the same like, I respect you and you respect me. I will hear what you say but you need to hear what I am going to say too- and let's find the middle ground that works for both.
I know that there are things that women can do and men can't, vice versa. But the right to pursue similar things like what guys want- I think these are what we mean by gender equality. And in a relationship- it is to be an equal partner, to be respected, to be loved and supported, and to always find the middle ground π
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